Feeling Stuck? Here's One Way to Finally Move Forward

Most people know that changing a behavior—like eating healthier, exercising more, or cutting back on alcohol—is good for them.

But actually doing it? That’s a whole different story.

According to the research of Drs. James and Janice Prochaska in Changing to Thrive, four behaviors account for the majority of chronic illness and premature death:

What we eat
Whether or not we smoke
Whether or not we drink alcohol
How we move our bodies (or don’t)

But there’s a fifth threat—one that makes all the others harder to manage: stress.

When we’re stressed, we’re much more likely to reach for junk food, skip workouts, have that extra drink, or fall back into unhealthy habits we’ve been trying to change.

So if you feel stuck in your efforts to change a health behavior, the first step might not be forcing yourself to "just try harder."

It might be learning to manage your stress first.

The Smart Way to Start: Build Up the Pros of Change

One of the biggest findings from the Changing to Thrive research was this:

To move from not ready to ready to take action, the pros of change need to increase at twice the rate that the cons decrease.

In simpler terms? The more clearly you see the benefits of changing, the more likely you are to follow through.

Instead of focusing on the hard parts of changing your habits, try focusing on the good things that come after the change. This small mindset shift can boost your "behavior change IQ".

And one of the easiest ways to start is by focusing on stress management.

digestive system drawing overlayed on woman's body

Why Start with Stress?

Stress is the hidden driver of so many of our habits. If we can reduce our stress—just a little bit each day—it becomes so much easier to choose nourishing food, move our bodies, say no to that extra drink, and finally make time for rest.

And here's the beautiful thing: You only need to commit 20 minutes a day to a healthy stress-reducing activity to begin creating change.

You don’t have to overhaul your life. You just have to open your mind to the possibility that things can get better—starting with one small, feel-good shift.

Exercise: The "Feeling Better" Benefits List

This powerful exercise comes directly from the book Changing to Thrive by James O. Prochaska, PhD, and Janice M. Prochaska, PhD—an incredible guide for anyone looking to create real, lasting behavior change.

In their decades of research, the Prochaskas found that increasing your pros for change is one of the most important things you can do to move out of stuckness and into action.

This particular exercise helps you connect with all the benefits—physical, emotional, social, and more—that come from managing your stress in a healthy way.

Instructions:

Read through each section and pick the benefits that feel meaningful to you.
Add any personal ones that come to mind.
Rank your top 5 to 10 in order of importance.
Use this list to stay connected to why stress management matters for you.

Behavioral Well-Being

I want to reduce cravings for smoking, drinking, or unhealthy food
I want to reduce excuses for not exercising
I want to feel more in control of my impulses

Physical Well-Being

I want to reduce my risk of high blood pressure, heart disease, and stroke
I want to feel less tension in my body
I want to get sick less often and recover faster
I want to sleep better and feel more rested

Emotional Well-Being

I want to reduce anxiety and depression
I want to feel more joy and calm
I want to worry less and feel more centered
I want to feel like I’m enjoying life again

Functioning & Mental Clarity

I want more energy and focus
I want to make decisions more easily
I want to be less forgetful
I want to feel motivated again

Purpose & Meaning

I want to feel proud of how I’m living
I want to function better at work and home
I want more time and energy for my passions
I want to feel excited about the future

Social Well-Being

I want to improve my relationships
I want to set a positive example for my kids
I want to feel less irritable with the people I love

Start Here. Start Small. Start With You.

You don’t need to take giant steps right away. But if you can build up the reasons why this matters to you—if you can name and connect to what you’re moving toward—you’ve already taken the first real step.

Stress management is not just a nice-to-have. It’s the foundation for lasting change in every other area of your health.

And it can start with something as simple as: